Unsettling Discoveries...

I’m a pretty clean person. One would think that any place I inhabit would not be a suitable home for any sort of rodent or insect. However, I have recently discovered that my truck has become a hospitable environment for some sort of mutant, radioactive spiders.
I don’t think they started out as mutant, radioactive spiders. Because the other day when we went camping, Michael astutely noticed a very small spider crawling up the inside of the windshield. Gross. Yet squishable.

You must understand my opinion about insects. I don’t mind them…they’re creepy, but typically harmless. But…should one make the mistake of entering my humble abode, whether it be house, apartment, or car, it is all out war. And trust me, the insect will lose, no matter what it takes. So, of course, I mercilessly squash the tiny little spider. But then, no less than an hour later, a slightly larger spider is seen crawling up the windshield! Again, disgusting, yet disposable.

Then, just last night, I’m driving down the road, and suddenly, a much larger spider, perhaps an inch to an inch and a half in diameter, is crawling up the inside of the windshield! Now while all spiders that enter my personal space are sentenced to death, I am still a female. And while it is socially acceptable for me to, well, scream like a girl, freaking out is less desirable when you’re driving down the road. But since I already mentioned that I refuse to lose the spider vs. human battles, the spider must die a horrible death. So I kill the giant spider. With my bare hands. Ok hand…the other one was still driving.

But what disturbs me is that I can’t help but notice that the spiders keep getting bigger and bigger. I fear that there may have been some sort of spider-Ford reaction that is mutating a nest of ordinary spiders into giant, Crys-eating insects. One of these days I expect to see 8 giant hairy legs in my rear view mirror creeping over the top of the driver's seat, seeking revenge for his smaller brothers and ready to squish me with a giant kleenex.